Video: Change in presidents race direction confuses Teddy too. Abe cheats but gets the win.

The Nationals’ apparent decision to vary the location of the presidents race finish line in 2012 isn’t just confusing for the spectators at Nationals Park. Apparently Teddy Roosevelt is a bit out of sorts over it as well. After alternating the location for the first two games, the Nationals gave the reasonable impression that the …

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Continue reading Video: Change in presidents race direction confuses Teddy too. Abe cheats but gets the win.

Video: Teddy Roosevelt avoids disqualification by losing

The 34,821 fans who packed Nationals Park Saturday night got an unexpected thrill during the 4th inning presidents race, as 426-time loser Teddy Roosevelt made an exciting late charge after emerging last out of the starting gate. Though Teddy barely failed to catch front-runner Thomas Jefferson, the exciting charge by Teddy got the crowd on … Continue reading Video: Teddy Roosevelt avoids disqualification by losing

Video: Teddy locks out competition, celebrates prematurely

It seems Teddy Roosevelt has tried just about every way, legitimate and otherwise, to gain advantage over his opponents in the Washington Nationals’ presidents race. Yet Tuesday night at Nationals Park, the hero of San Juan Hill came up with an entirely new 4th-inning strategy — lock up the competition. After bursting through the center … Continue reading Video: Teddy locks out competition, celebrates prematurely

Video: Jefferson cheats, knocks out Abe, wins anyway!

Will somebody please hold Screech accountable? In one of the most blatant examples ever of the anti-Teddy conspiracy, the Nationals’ feathered mascot and presidents race judge handed the victory to Thomas Jefferson Tuesday night, despite an overwhelming case for Tom’s disqualification. When the race began, Abe Lincoln jumped out to a big lead, and despite … Continue reading Video: Jefferson cheats, knocks out Abe, wins anyway!

Jayson Werth shows disgust as Nats fail to let Teddy win

A day after revealing his displeasure that Teddy never wins, Nationals outfielder Jayson Werth clearly held hope that the Nationals had listened. As George, Tom, Abe, and Teddy began the presidents race Saturday afternoon, the Nationals’ 126 million dollar man moved to the top of the dugout steps in anticipation. Werth watched the race until … Continue reading Jayson Werth shows disgust as Nats fail to let Teddy win

Teddy is disqualified for “Unauthorized Use of a Feline”

It was a beautiful night at Nationals Park, with a game time temperature of 73 degrees and a crowd of 17,153 on hand to watch a classic pitchers’ duel between the Nationals’ John Lannan and the Philadelphia Phillies’ Pedro Martinez. With the Nationals up 1-0 in the 4th inning and Lannan cruising through the World … Continue reading Teddy is disqualified for “Unauthorized Use of a Feline”

Teddy crosses first, is disqualified for riding motor scooter

Perhaps Teddy was inspired by recent events. Perhaps, just 2 days after “honest” Abe Lincoln pushed and cheated his way to victory, avoiding disqualification while knocking down his opponents, Teddy Roosevelt concluded that the judges weren’t paying attention. Of course, he could have picked a more subtle way to cheat. On Sunday, before a crowd … Continue reading Teddy crosses first, is disqualified for riding motor scooter