Video: Jefferson cheats, knocks out Abe, wins anyway!

Will somebody please hold Screech accountable?

In one of the most blatant examples ever of the anti-Teddy conspiracy, the Nationals’ feathered mascot and presidents race judge handed the victory to Thomas Jefferson Tuesday night, despite an overwhelming case for Tom’s disqualification.

Thomas Jefferson Presidents Race CheatsThomas Jefferson Presidents Race CheatingThomas Jefferson as John Cena - You Cant See Me!When the race began, Abe Lincoln jumped out to a big lead, and despite running into the outfield wall, still held a big advantage over George Washington and Teddy Roosevelt entering the home stretch.

Jefferson, meanwhile, failed to participate, instead appearing for the duration of the race just in front of the finish line in first base foul territory.

As Lincoln approached the tape, Tom jumped out and slammed him to the ground. The Sage of Monticello then waltzed across the finish line, and to the dismay of 26,759 in the stands, was declared the victor.

Is there any doubt that Teddy Roosevelt would have faced instant disqualification?

After being declared the winner, Jefferson faced the in-stadium cameras and waved his hand in front of his face. Apparently Tom’s ambush and the “You Can’t See Me!” reference were a tribute to WWE wrestler John Cena, who was in the house. [Thanks Tom]

Video courtesy of YouTube member lfahome.

Teddy crosses first, is disqualified for riding a Segway

Teddy in the Washington Nationals Presidents Race aboard a SegwayIn the final game of an undoubtedly difficult homestand for racing president Teddy Roosevelt, our 26th president decided it was time to leave nothing to doubt.

Unfortunately for Teddy, he could have picked a more subtle way to cheat.

When the presidents emerged in center field for the 4th-inning race, Teddy was out in front aboard a Segway personal transporter.

The other presidents were on foot.

Tom, Abe, and George struggled to keep up in the 98-degree heat, and Teddy held the lead from wire to wire.

The crowd erupted as Teddy broke the tape with a fist raised high in victory, but the cheers from the crowd ended moments later, when Screech jumped in.

Never one to put up with Teddy’s antics, the Nationals’ mascot and presidents race judge quickly interrupted Teddy’s victory dance and waved off the victory.

After disqualifying Teddy for riding the Segway, Screech awarded the victory to Thomas Jefferson, provoking a rain of boos from the crowd.

After taking the series from the Phillies, the Nationals now hit the road for an extended trip west, giving both Teddy and Screech some time to cool off.

Video courtesy of YouTube member lfahome

Jayson Werth shows disgust as Nats fail to let Teddy win

Nationals Presidents Race 5/28/2011Jayson Werth disgusted that Teddy never wins the Presidents Race

Abe Cheats

On Friday night, a Nat Pack member helps Abe cheat. Teddy has been disqualified for similar antics, but Abe gets a pass every time.

Abe Cheats Button from LetTeddyWin.comA day after revealing his displeasure that Teddy never wins, Nationals outfielder Jayson Werth clearly held hope that the Nationals had listened.

As George, Tom, Abe, and Teddy began the presidents race Saturday afternoon, the Nationals’ 126 million dollar man moved to the top of the dugout steps in anticipation. Werth watched the race until it became clear that Teddy had no chance, then turned back to the dugout and waved in disgust.

The open disdain demonstrated by Werth was noted immediately by Nats followers across Twitter, and by the MASN broadcast team, who replayed the brush off in the bottom of the 4th inning.

Overnight, Werth has brought a spotlight onto the nearly five-year shut down of Teddy by Nationals officials who persist in denying any conspiracy.

What pushed Werth to suddenly “come out” Friday night in favor of letting Teddy Win? Perhaps it was that night’s race, which may have been the most blatant example ever that the Nats will help Abe cheat at the expense of Teddy Roosevelt.

Lincoln was dressed as pro wrestler Randy “Macho Man” Savage, and halfway through the race, his hat fell down over his face, blinding the 16th president.

No sooner had the hat slipped than a member of the Nationals mascot team raced onto the field and helped push Abe to the finish line. Race judge Screech turned the other cheek and failed to disqualify “Honest” Abe, who was awarded the victory.

Screech has disqualified Teddy for a myriad of reasons, including unnecessary roughness, cutting the corner, and even running when he should be walking. Lincoln, who has a track record of pushing and shoving his way to victory, has never been disqualified.

Video courtesy of YouTube member lfahome.

Video: Teddy knocks out showboating Abe Lincoln

After watching Abe Lincoln take 8 of the last 10 presidents races, the Great Emancipator got a little cocky, but Teddy Roosevelt decide to take things into his own hands on Sunday at Nationals Park.

Washington Nationals Presidents RaceAfter jumping out to a quick start, Lincoln turned around to taunt the other presidents, but Teddy caught up and slammed the Great Emancipator into the outfield scoreboard. Abe came up limp and failed to finish, as Thomas Jefferson pulled away for the victory.

In a post-race tweet, Teddy declared “How you like me now Abe? You won’t get in my way anymore!”

The Nats are mum regarding the extent, if any, of Honest Abe’s injuries.

Video courtesy of YouTube member lfahome

Teddy Roosevelt flattens Abraham Lincoln with a right hook

Teddy Roosevelt had a choice to make Thursday night at Nationals Park.

Our 26th president took a healthy lead into the home stretch of the 4th-inning presidents race. With a 20-yard lead over Abraham Lincoln, Teddy had nothing but daylight between himself and a first-ever presidents race victory.

Teddy Roosevelt punches Abe Lincoln in the Nationals Park presidents raceBut the first base foul territory proved
too tempting a spot for an ambush.

With his chief rival closing in from behind, Teddy stopped, turned, and cold-cocked Abe Lincoln with a right hook that sent the Great Emancipator spinning.

It was a double-defeat for Lincoln, who got to his feet in time to watch Thomas Jefferson waltz across the finish line,
and into a tie with Abe for first place in the season standings.

Video courtesy of YouTube member lfahome

Teddy blows it twice to close Nationals’ homestand

Teddy Roosevelt cheats in the Washington Nationals presidents race at Nationals ParkWith a rare late afternoon start and temperatures in the mid-90s for the final game of this week’s homestand, the last thing anybody at Nationals Park probably wanted to do was exert themselves by running a sprint around the full length of the warning track.

So when Teddy Roosevelt saw nothing but green between himself and the presidents race finish line on Wednesday, he chose the easy route, jogging straight across the outfield.

Roosevelt’s hopes for an easy victory were dashed when the speedy Abe Lincoln caught up to him anyway. That’s when Teddy simply threw in the towel — a mistake that cost him when The Great Emancipator tripped and fell, giving George the unlikely victory.

Teddy’s only consolation: He didn’t break a sweat, and had he broken the tape instead of George, he would surely have been disqualified for cheating.

Video courtesy of YouTube member lfahome

Inspired by Nyjer Morgan, Abe throws a fit of his own

The crowd at Nationals Park wasn’t paying too much attention during Saturday’s presidents race at Nationals Park.

The race began just moments after Nats centerfielder Nyjer Morgan singlehandedly allowed an inside-the-park home run by throwing a fit instead of chasing after a ball he should have caught to end the Orioles 4th inning.

Abe Lincoln pushes Teddy Roosevelt to the Ground - Washington Nationals presidents raceOne pitch and one out later, the crowd of 30,000+ was still on its feet and buzzing about the oddity they had witnessed as the presidents race began.

Teddy Roosevelt took an early lead, but Abraham Lincoln, upset about falling to 3rd place in the presidents race standings, took a cue from Nyjer Morgan and threw a little fit of his own.

Chasing Teddy from behind, Abe dropped him to the ground, then turned to go after the other presidents.

After slamming Tom into the stands, he pranced across the finish line and climbed into the crowd to celebrate.

For the first time since Nationals Park opened, the Orioles mascot “The Bird” failed to make an appearance for the interleague race.

His Nationals counterpart Screech, who allegedly judges the presidents race, was a no show himself, failing once again to disqualify “Honest” Abe despite blatant cheating.

Nyjer Morgan photo by Cheryl Nichols/Nats News Network

Uniform change no help for Nationals or Teddy

The Nationals toyed with the forces of mojo Thursday night at Nationals Park, trotting out their rarely-used red, white, and blue alternate jerseys for the players, and letting the racing presidents don their traditional period uniforms for the first time this season.

It didn’t work.

The Nats’ normally solid defense fell apart early, committing 3 errors, and Teddy Roosevelt delivered one of his weakest races of the season. Even after cheating and cutting the outfield corner, the original Rough Rider never challenged front-runner Thomas Jefferson.

The Battle of the Beltways starts Friday. Look for the Orioles to bring their creatively-named mascot The Bird to Nationals Park for a third year of presidents race-related hijinks.

Video by YouTube member lfahome

Abe shows his anger as George fixes final presidents race

It was an afternoon to remember at Nationals Park.

The last game of the season was designated Fan Appreciation Day by the Nationals, and the 23,944 who made their way to Natstown for the rare late afternoon start got plenty to appreciate, starting with free fleece blankets and leading to perhaps a glimpse of the future: heroics by the team’s young prospects, a sweep of the New York Mets, and an unlikely playoff atmosphere.

Heading into the game, it appeared that little suspense remained in the Nationals disappointing season beyond the outcome of the 4th-inning presidents race.

Would Abe Lincoln, coming off a 5-race winning streak, extend his dominance? Would Teddy Roosevelt surprise the field, end the curse, and send Nats fans into the off season filled with hope? Or would George Washington or Thomas Jefferson emerge from the pack to break their 2nd-place tie in the final race of the year?

Abe and Tom broke out to an early lead, with Teddy trailing behind. George Washington uncharacteristically got a late start, then inexplicably ran the wrong way along the left field wall.

Abe and Tom ran neck and neck around the right field corner before realizing that the finish line had disappeared. It had been moved to the other side of the field, where George was crossing it uncontested.

As this video by YouTube member lfahome shows, Abe Lincoln was furious, and let out some of his ‘roid rage on the tarp roller in foul territory.

It’s not clear how or why the finish line moved, but it appears that only George got the memo.

If in fact George Washington fixed the race in his favor, then one would think he’d be disqualified. But as we all know, Teddy will finish the season as the only racing president to have been subject to disqualification. The fix is definitely in, but it’s all about Teddy. It’s “wait ’till next year” once again for Teddy Roosevelt fans. Here’s hoping that next season they’ll Let Teddy Win.

Final 2009 Presidents Race Standings:

Abraham Lincoln 40
George Washington 22
Thomas Jefferson 21
Teddy Roosevelt 0

Photo by Flickr user tbridge

Teddy is disqualified for “Unauthorized Use of a Feline”

It was a beautiful night at Nationals Park, with a game time temperature of 73 degrees and a crowd of 17,153 on hand to watch a classic pitchers’ duel between the Nationals’ John Lannan and the Philadelphia Phillies’ Pedro Martinez.

With the Nationals up 1-0 in the 4th inning and Lannan cruising through the World Champions’ batting order, it seemed the only thing that could make the night better would be a victory for Teddy Roosevelt.

That CatTeddy tried a little too hard.

As George Washington sprinted out to an early presidents race lead, Teddy recruited his onetime nemesis That
Cat
to join the race.

The now-familiar panther slammed
Abe Lincoln into the outfield wall, then
chased down George Washington and knocked him to the ground, before finally putting the block on Thomas Jefferson, leaving Teddy Roosevelt with an uncontested path to the finish line.

A biased Nationals Park crowd cheered Teddy’s apparent victory, but Screech quickly stepped in to issue the disqualification for “Illegal Use of a Feline.”

Contacted after the race, Screech responded “”Teddy brought that cat with him onto the field, it was an unfair advantage, he told that cat to tackle George Tom and Abe!! Cheating = DISQUALIFIED!””

Abe quickly got up off the ground to cross the tape and steal Teddy’s thunder, leading us to ask whether judge Screech and racing president Abe are in cahoots. After all, Abe has been known to cheat from time to time, but when was the last time he was disqualified?

And the in-game play-by-play:

Video by YouTube members lfahome and TheTeddyRoosevelt.
Finish line photo by Flickr member melanie.phung

Teddy crosses first, is disqualified for riding motor scooter

Perhaps Teddy was inspired by recent events.

Perhaps, just 2 days after “honest” Abe Lincoln pushed and cheated his way to victory, avoiding disqualification while knocking down his opponents, Teddy Roosevelt concluded that the judges weren’t paying attention.

Of course, he could have picked a more subtle way to cheat.

Teddy Roosevelt rides a motor scooter in the presidents race at Nationals ParkOn Sunday, before a crowd of 20,747 at Nationals Park, Teddy pulled out one of his old tricks, coming from behind aboard a motor scooter, passing the other presidents and leaving them in the dust.

Screech, of course, ignored the roar of the approving crowd and disqualified Teddy immediately. Abe Lincoln, sensing opportunity, paced the other presidents and was granted the win.

Photo by Flickr user say71

Presidents go down quickly, Teddy notches loss #250

With Garrett Mock on the mound against the San Diego Padres, the Washington Nationals and Teddy Roosevelt followed similar patterns tonight at Nationals Park, barely getting out of the gate before blowing any chance they had for victory.

Teddy quickly locked up his 250th consecutive presidents race loss when he collided with Thomas Jefferson at the starting gate, leaving only George Washington to challenge Abe Lincoln. Abe took care of things from there, knocking George to the ground to clear his path to the finish line as Screech looked on.

Is “Judge Screech” in Abe Lincoln’s pocket? He’s disqualified Teddy for far less. Why hasn’t Screech ever disqualified “Honest” Abe?

Coach Ron SimmsNote: We were thrilled to see Section 128 usher Ron “Coach” Simms back in action tonight at his familiar post. Coach reports that under Doctor’s orders, he’s not allowed to dance on top of the dugout during “Sweet Caroline” for at least a few more weeks, but he’s looking great and on the mend. Welcome back Coach!

Teddy races on a unicycle, loses lead quickly

Washington Nationals racing president Teddy Roosevelt races on a unicycleThe largest crowd in Nationals Park history was on hand Tuesday night for the opener of the Washington Nationals first home series against the Boston Red Sox.

The variety of Red Sox paraphernalia on display suggested that many were going to see their first Washington Nationals presidents race, and Teddy Roosevelt — always the showman — set out to make an impression.

Abe Lincoln wins the Washington Nationals presidents race.When the 4th inning race began, Teddy dashed out and hopped aboard a unicycle. Whether our #26 thought this would help him win the race is hard to say, but he gave it a valiant effort before falling quickly behind the other racing presidents.

Teddy gave up on the unicycle about half-way through the race, but it was far too late to catch up to Abe Lincoln, who has now won four of the last 5 races to take a commanding lead in the season standings.

Abe Lincoln says “Make Teddy Earn It!”

A member of the Nat Pack holds up a sign reading Let Teddy Win at Nationals ParkAbe Lincoln set out to make a point on Sunday at Nationals Park.

As the presidents were being announced for the 4th-inning presidents race, “Honest Abe” jumped out of the centerfield gate like a bat out of hell, staking a huge lead over the other presidents but heading straight for the stands along the first base line, where somebody was holding up a sign that read “Let Teddy Win.”

Racing President Abe Lincoln says Make Teddy Earn ItAbe grabbed the sign and held it up, then ripped it in half, reached into the stands, and produced another sign that read “Make Teddy Earn It!”

The Great Emancipator, who has been accused of cheating before, is obviously not a fan of the Let Teddy Win movement, instead wanting us to believe that he keeps winning all these races on his own.

But we know the truth. If Teddy Roosevelt were truly allowed to let loose, he’d lift this curse and put a serious whipping on his Mt. Rushmore counterparts that they’d never forget.

Photos by Flickr members Tory Brown and _rockinfree
Video by YouTube member TheTeddyRoosevelt.

Teddy cheats, loses anyway

The Washington Nationals returns to town last night to kick off a homestand against Tim Lincecum and the San Francisco Giants.

The defense was solid, the bullpen held up, and the Nationals rallied for a much-needed win. Unfortunately, the change in fortune did not extend to Teddy Roosevelt during the 4th-inning presidents race.

Remarkably, despite holding the lead going into the outfield corner, Teddy decided to cut the corner to extend his advantage.

It didn’t help. Thomas Jefferson caught up quickly and took the tape as Teddy faded in the home stretch.

Video courtesy of YouTube member lfahome

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